Tuesday, November 22, 2005
A Very Strange Little Girl
Someone told me I was like River, from Firefly. You know. The strange girl.
I think these were the noted similarities: too intelligent for her own good, strange, pouty, over-emotional for no good reason, strange. And apparently I kind of look like River, which I don't really see at all.
I was surprised and not exactly flattered. All the other female characters are attractive in their own way. But River is not even really on the attractiveness scale. River is just weird and annoying and doesn't really belong. No one really likes her and its seems she makes people nervous and uncomfortable. Great. I have always suspected I make people nervous and uncomfortable but only one person has ever come out and said it. Brave boy.
Anyway once I started thinking about it there are quite a few other similarities between me and River: very perceptive/intuitive, a strange way of intereacting with people, moody, a dancer, prone to wandering around and communing with objects rather than with people, a tendency to say stuff that no one else understands but makes perfect sense to her.
Kind of depressing that.
In the middle of the Ariel episode someone says about River: "She feels everything. She can't not." I think I burst into tears, which I guess is not an unusual event. But then the other day a friend asked how I was doing. All I could say was "I don't know." What I actually meant was "good" and "OK" and "crap" and "depressed" and "sad" and "bored" and "tired" and "excited" and "calm" and "upset" and "disappointed" and "bubbly" and "apathetic" and "hopeless" and "content" and "on to it" and "drowning" and "lost" all at once. Actually, prefix all those preceding adjectives with "extremely." That would be more accurate.
So I think it all averages out to tired and overwhelmed. It is kind of scary. It is kind of irrational. I've never been quite like this before. Maybe it's because I have been meditating so now I am calmly and detachedly overwhelmed and emotional. That can't be right though.
I think these were the noted similarities: too intelligent for her own good, strange, pouty, over-emotional for no good reason, strange. And apparently I kind of look like River, which I don't really see at all.
I was surprised and not exactly flattered. All the other female characters are attractive in their own way. But River is not even really on the attractiveness scale. River is just weird and annoying and doesn't really belong. No one really likes her and its seems she makes people nervous and uncomfortable. Great. I have always suspected I make people nervous and uncomfortable but only one person has ever come out and said it. Brave boy.
Anyway once I started thinking about it there are quite a few other similarities between me and River: very perceptive/intuitive, a strange way of intereacting with people, moody, a dancer, prone to wandering around and communing with objects rather than with people, a tendency to say stuff that no one else understands but makes perfect sense to her.
Kind of depressing that.
In the middle of the Ariel episode someone says about River: "She feels everything. She can't not." I think I burst into tears, which I guess is not an unusual event. But then the other day a friend asked how I was doing. All I could say was "I don't know." What I actually meant was "good" and "OK" and "crap" and "depressed" and "sad" and "bored" and "tired" and "excited" and "calm" and "upset" and "disappointed" and "bubbly" and "apathetic" and "hopeless" and "content" and "on to it" and "drowning" and "lost" all at once. Actually, prefix all those preceding adjectives with "extremely." That would be more accurate.
So I think it all averages out to tired and overwhelmed. It is kind of scary. It is kind of irrational. I've never been quite like this before. Maybe it's because I have been meditating so now I am calmly and detachedly overwhelmed and emotional. That can't be right though.
// posted by suze @ 8:58 PM 
Comments:
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I think it was just a comment designed to get a reaction. The reaction is a little delayed.
IMO in the tv series (I guess the photos are OK) River doesn't come across as attractive at all. She comes across as extremely strange.
90degrees. OK I just assumed that people can only feel one strong emotion at a time. I could be wrong.
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IMO in the tv series (I guess the photos are OK) River doesn't come across as attractive at all. She comes across as extremely strange.
90degrees. OK I just assumed that people can only feel one strong emotion at a time. I could be wrong.
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